THE MATCHLESS PEARL
“The teacher was listening to the students complaining about their parents’ attitudes toward them. Most of the students were complaining about their fathers, because of the great pressure they put on them. One after another….as the number of his friends complaining about their fathers increased, his eyes filled with tears, because he did not have father to complain about. The unbearable and incomparable explosion of pain caused by the absence of his father in his childhood memories filled the void in his mind and heart. Alas, all that pain did not change anything, because he had been permanently disabled by not having a father during his childhood…”
Orphans are disabled people who are never categorized as disabled, but who suffer the consequences of this “neglected” disability. It is the disability of not having a mother or father during the period of your life until the age of six; a period when you are constructing your inner world, making up sub-conscious paradigms to understand the outer world, and developing manners by which to express yourself among others. In other words, you are setting up the connections between your material and spiritual aspects. A person whose mother is absent during their childhood is disabled in terms of being able to fully understand and experience spirituality; and a person whose father is absent in the same period is disabled in their interactions with the material world.
It was November of 1979 when I joined the world of the disabled;it was my father who disappeared. But I was too young to comprehend the situation. It took me twenty-six years to understand my state as an orphan, and to finally start thinking about the ways that I could overcome my disability. As I have difficulty in understanding and experiencing the outer world, I am not able to express my inner world in the outer one as I wish.Also, I am not able to analyze the message I receive from other people as I am expected to. The outcome of such a disconnection between other people and me is failure in social interactions.
However, this disability helps me better appreciate certain things that other people do not. For example, there are many holy people whose fathers were absent during their childhood for one reason or another. The most prominent of these people are the prophets Moses, Jesus, and Muhammad, peace be upon them. Because of the absence of their fathers during childhood, it is expected that they would become people who experienced difficulties in their relations with others, or people who could not develop strong self-esteem, which is essential in becoming a leader. Contrary to these expectations, they had a very successful life in realizing the goal of their missions, which was to convey the world of god as it is revealed and to form an exemplary community of believers. On the other hand, the apparent setback of being an orphan became an advantage and worked as a preconditioned for the mission which they were destined to undertake. Though their fathers were absent, they were supported by their mothers, whose existence and education deeply inculcated compassion and spiritually in them. Thus, they naturally had a great potential to develop a strong bond with God and deep compassion towards their people.
Considering the life story of the Prophet Muhammad, these facts can be observed very clearly. His father, Abdullah, died before his birth. So, the Prophet Muhammad only had his mother,Amina as his parent. Then, at the age of six, he lost his mother too. This meant that he had neither parent for the remainder of his childhood. After his mother had passed away, Abdulmuttalib, his grandfather, undertook his guardianship. Unfortunately,his grandfather could not stay with him for a long time, his death coming two years later. Among his uncles, the poorest one, Abu Talib, despite his old age and his many other children, agreed to foster Muhammad, the matchless orphan pearl. Today's statistics show that a child in such misery, if not cared for properly, is a potential future criminal, if not a victim of suicide. However, the events in the prophet's life that would remind him of his orphan state did not finish there. Nine years after he started to teach Islam, his wife Khadijah and his uncle Abu Talib died. These two deaths came at a time when Muhammad was terribly in need of support. In the later years of his life, three of his four daughters passed away. This sequence of losses kept him constantly in the psychology of being an orphan throughout his life.
Aside from these tragic events, when the achievements of his lifetime are examined, one cannot help but admire him. He started to teach Islam alone, but eventually conquered the hearts of thousands. He ministered in a society where the most abominable sins were commited daily and moral values were almost non-existent;yet he was able to transform that society into people of righteousness with high moral values. He established a state that grew to become the source of civilization;and he did this despite resistance from his own tribe and other super powers of the time. It is a miracle in addition to all the others that the Prophet Muhammad was able to overcome his situation as an orphan and achieve all these great things. This is a fact that points to God as the protector and educator of this orphan.
It has been about 1,400 years since the line of prophethood ended. Today, in 2006, looking at my current situation, I find myself in a struggle to overcome my disability. The similiarity between my life story and the life story of the Prophet Muhammad, who is one of the most esteemed prophets, give me the light of hope;a light that carries the warmth of compassion and the serenity of wisdom of God.
-SERMED OGRETIM, A TRIBUTE TO THE PROPHET MUHAMMAD, CELEBRATING THE BLESSED BIRTH-
